Smiling Picture

20 04 2012

Smiling picture look away

My heart can’t stand to see you today

You look so happy, so picturesque

A painful reminder that someday

We all enter eternal rest

Smiling picture look away

Stop mocking life with your display

Frozen still to quietly tease

Stop being there, just go away please

I don’t want to see

I refuse to reminisce

A person I will always miss

It is too soon

To fondly remember

To smile for the good

I only see cold, gray pallor

Death personified

I only taste the salt of tears we all have cried

Smiling picture disappear

You represent just what I fear

Being gone, just like that

Like I was never there at all

When in the shadow of my mortality

I find it hard to keep my gall

Smiling picture look away

My heart is too fragile to see you today





Goodbye Uncle John

7 04 2012

My uncle John died on March 21, 2012.  I wrote this poem two days after.

Goodbye Uncle John

It hurts to say so long

All the memories are clearer now

Precious and we’ll never forget

Just how much to us you meant

Goodbye Uncle John

For a man who spoke so few

I have so many words for you

It’s not enough to say ‘”I love,”

And it’s not enough to say “I miss,”

Because it comes down to a single moment

One more hug

One  more laugh

One more meal

But even then I still would feel

A need for just once more

To see you walking through the door

Smiling gruffly just once more

Goodbye Uncle John

Husband

Father

Cousin

Friend

Someday we’ll meet again

But until then

Goodbye Uncle John

It hurts to say so long

You may not be here

But you will never be gone





Choking For Words

8 02 2012

There is a Chinese girl in my history class whom I have become friends with.  She has only lived here in the states for a few years and all things considered is quite fluent. Today we had to read aloud in class and when it got the person before her, it hit me: What would she do? Her accent is rather heavy and she is very soft-spoken.  She started to read and I cringed as the other students snickered. It was all I could do to not slam their cruel faces with my textbook. For a country that encourages immigration, we are so mean to the immigrants once they arrive.

In my recent endeavors to learn Spanish, I have realized how hard it is to learn a new language, particularly one as irregular as English.  I have a new-found respect for the bilingual.

To me it seems like choking

Air supply beneath that of mere survival

Knowing so well what you want to say

Only once translated, it’s all twisted

The words don’t properly form

A new language has turned you forlorn

You cannot fit in

When you can hardly talk

And at your oddly said words they balk

Going out of their way to make it harder

Not even realizing that you are smarter

Because they can’t hear over their own laughter

That’s what it looks like to me as I watch

Her face says she knows she can’t belong

When the language she does know is all wrong

 

 





Shards of Glass

6 02 2012

It was a delicate sculpture of glass

Balanced precariously on a mountain top

Winds were soft

Barely keeping clouds aloft

And then one day

The sky turned gray

And wept out all the rain

A physical release of hidden pain

The torrent grew worse as the deadly hail came

And turned that delicate sculpture of glass

Into a million scintillating shards

That skidded of the mountainside

To lay upon the ground and bide

The chance to regain a love’s fragile pride





I’m Falling

26 01 2012

My ledge crumbled

And took me with it

My hands are torn and bleeding

My heart hangs heavy with a needing

For your warm hands and arms

I am weak and I am falling

Please come help me climb

Hold out your hand and be my lifeline

I know I caused you so much pain

I can’t do anything now but shout your name

I’m so sorry, your heart was not mine to shatter

My life was bleak and then you came

I took you for granted

I was such a fool

I’m so sorry, you don’t need to forgive

Just hold out your hand and I’ll be on my way

I’m not asking you to stay

Just to save me from myself





What Is Shown Versus the Hidden Unknown

17 01 2012

I hate you

I just want to talk

You killed my heart

Once upon a time you made it grow

You made a fool of me

I fell hard for you

The heart-tears you put me through

The smiles you put on my face

You cheated on me

I still want you

I hope you’re damn happy

I’m not

You don’t deserve me

I’m the only one who understands you

You’ll never hear from me again

If I call, will you answer?

It was all your fault

And mine too

You’ll never find another like me

No one makes me laugh like you

Good riddance

I weep for us

I wrote this because we so often put on that angry face and hide how we truly feel because we don’t want to be considered pathetic.

Many of my love poems have been in existence for several weeks, I have to wait to publish those because I have to get over the feelings.

Andrea Z.

 





Coup de Grâce

16 01 2012

She was down on the ground

Balled up in defiant defeat

He had her in his palm

One last kick

At her shaky pride

His victor’s grin

He could not hide

She told him he’d won

He said he wasn’t done with the fun

She told him to leave

Find someone else to torture

With words so very cold

And threats so very bold

He said the last spurn would be his

And he made it so

Her mind and body red and raw

He raised his fist

A coward’s coup de grâce